Stop The Presses! - Part 2

Loyal Fans:

I am sure that you are "chomping at the bit" as much as I am to hear more from Hank van Rensselaer and so without further delay, I am going to allow him to continue his yarn:

"I had a girlfriend at the time.  We lived together and we didn't.  I spent every night with her in her apartment.  We ate meals together there.  I spent whatever free time I had, did my laundry and brushed my teeth there.  We made love there.  And yet, I insisted on keeping my own apartment.  This apartment was, in essence, a $1,200 per month storage facility.  My clothes and few possessions enjoyed a lovely one-bedroom on a quiet, tree-lined street.  I slept there one night in all of 2000 and 2001, when my girlfriend had the flu.  Otherwise, I visited the apartment daily only to gather fresh clothes and collect my mail.

There weren't any issues with my girlfriend.  She did want a ring on her finger but I don't think that tension was particular to our relationship.  And she challenged me to be a better version of myself but that wasn't a bad thing, even if it was difficult at time.  No, the need for a separate apartment was all me.  I couldn't bring myself to commit.  Stupid, I know, given the reality of the situation.  What difference did it make where I kept my clothes?  I was already de facto living with my girlfriend, why the need for the separate apartment?  There are two answers:  First, if I actually, officially, totally moved in with my girlfriend, then I would actually, officially, totally be living with her.  I couldn't fool myself into thinking that we weren't co-habitating, that I wasn't committed to her.  Second, the apartment was my escape hatch.  If things went south with the relationship, I had an out, a refuge.  Or maybe something better would come along (although I didn't really believe this).  But it kept open the possibility.

I think it is hard to live in the moment.  There is so much regret and ambition and noise that can distort our focus and prevent us from truly being present.  Am I earning enough?  Did I make the right choice?  Will a new Oscar de la Renta suit make me look less like middle management?  And if you can't tune all that out and be truly present in the moment, you can't be truly happy.  I didn't know this then, of course.  I had to learn this from Adam.  Adam, who was happy just to be alive.

 TO BE CONTINUED..."

I simply cannot wait for more, Hank; thank you!  Stay tuned, friends.

In other news, post-production is proceeding on "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE".  We are working closely with our special effects vendors, sound engineers, foley artists and composer (boy, do I miss Skint!) to add those wonderful layers that enhance the viewers' experience with a theatrical motion picture.  However, the most exciting development is that we have decided to also offer a portion of the film as a virtual reality experience at select showings of the feature film.  And now, dear viewers, a question for you:  Would you rather experience the film from the viewpoint of Cheetah Larusse (in essence, inhabiting the character) or would you rather be in an immersive environment whereby you can fully explore Cheetah's world?  I know my preference but look forward to learning yours.

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

Stop The Presses!

Dear Friends:

I was just pitched the most incredible story from a promising writer.  And the best part is that it is entirely true!  Needless to say, I hired him on the spot to create a spec script before this gem was snatched up by another studio.

The stories all around us are truly amazing.  Our imaginations are divine but if they ceased to exist, there is enough adventure, romance, intrigue, sorrow and excitement in every day life to make a million movies.  This is one of those stories...

My fingers are shaking with excitement such that I can barely type.  So I will abdicate the forum and let this young talent begin to share his story with you directly.  Please allow me to introduce you to Hendrick "Hank" van Rensselaer:

"There is no better way to encapsulate my world view in November of 2000 than to let you know that my go-to website was GreedyAssociates.com... and I checked it often.  I had graduated law school earlier that year and after a two-month trip around Europe, I started working for one of the world's most prestigious law firms.  They paid me a ridiculous amount.  More than a middle-class boy from upstate New York could ever have dreamed of.  Enough that I had money to waste.  And this was in addition to my virtually non-accountable expense allowance.  But it wasn't enough.  No, I had to check GreedyAssociates.com several times a day to see if I was being paid at least as much as the new associates at every other top-tier law firm.

The ironic thing is that this entitlement had been bred into me by the firm itself.  The prior summer, I had been a "summer associate".  I did minimal work but the real point of the "job" was for the firm to recruit me.  And they did amazing work of it.  I ate ridiculously expensive meals nightly, including foods that I didn't even know existed like bone marrow.  I drank wines that cost more than the meals and that my palate was too unrefined to actually appreciate (frankly, they all just tasted like wine to me).  I took trips to places to which I never would otherwise have been granted access due to their "members only" status.  Anything that I wanted (as long as it was legal and a few things that weren't) was up for the taking; all I had to do was suggest it and my wish would be granted.

Did I appreciate all that the firm did to recruit me?  Sure.  But by the end of the summer I also felt that I deserved it.  It was indoctrinated into me that I had earned these spoils from my years of academic discipline and achievement.  That it was owed to me.  All hail king Hank!

But the whole thing was a kind of rope-a-dope.  A sleight of hand.  A parlor trick.  You see, once I was actually hired by the firm, I was paid handsomely but they extracted every penny from me.  The work was endless.  A bottomless pit of menial drudgery.  100 hour or more work weeks were commonplace.  And if you calculated that out on an hourly basis, it probably wasn't much different than your average plumber.  And that is why I checked GreedyAssociates.com.  Constantly.  To know that I was no worse off than anyone else in the Sisyphusian mess that I had gotten myself into.

It was important to the firm that it appear neither as sweat-shop nor Shylock and so it required its associates to do community service hours. The firm didn't care that we barely slept as is.  The public appearance of compassion was more important.  So the firm gave us a list of organizations from which to choose, and choose we must.  By the time the list made its way to me, most of the options had been selected.  Whatever I picked didn't really matter to me.  I don't recall giving it much thought.  This was a cost of doing business that I begrudgingly accepted.  So I moaned and groaned as I made my mark on the page:  United States Citizenship and Immigration Services.  Whatever.  I had no idea then how that careless choice would shape me and my life over the next 10 years.

TO BE CONTINUED..."

Well friends, do you see what I mean?  Wow!  Stay tuned for more to come...

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

Unparalleled Beauty And Talent

Hello again, Loyal Fans:

In case you didn't see the posting in Variety today, it is my pleasure to repeat here the names of the four female leads in The Many Loves Of Cheetah Larusse. In no particular order, they are: Emma Stone ("Superbad"); Kate Bosworth ("Blue Crush"); Rachelle Lefever ("Twilight"); and Maggie Grace ("Taken"). What a menagerie of beauty and talent. (And keep in mind, that these are only 4 of the more than 30 gorgeous actresses featured in the film!) Cheetah has surely met his match this time!

Emma Stone

Rachelle Lefever

Maggie Grace

Kate Bosworth

Now, more than ever,
Griffin

Seeing Double!

Loyal Fans:

Do you remember my writing a while back that LeTigre Jones (Head of Worldwide Marketing, Publicity & Promotions) has a brother named LeFever who was in play? Well, I am thrilled to announce that LeFever has joined the Studio as our new Head of Legal & Business Affairs! Please join me in congratulating LeFever. As you can imagine, he has an impressive pedigree: top tier law school, years of big firm and boutique experience and a long history in the same capacity with another major studio. LeFever is replacing Hume Crawford, who has decided to return to his native England for his Winter years; we wish him well!

For those of you on the lot, there is one point of note: LeTigre and LeFever are identical twins! I discovered this the hard way the first time I met LeFever. You see, LeTigre and I had been engaged in a heated debate about one of the finer points of our foreign distribution agreement. Well, upon seeing who I thought was LeTigre outside of the Commissary, I railed upon him, impressing my point with certain colorful language (yes, from time to time my passion for this business gets the best of me). LeFever looked at me with a mixture of confusion and fear. He said nothing though and I walked away thinking I had finally won the debate. I returned to the executive offices only to find LeTigre waiting for me in my office. "You walk fast," I commented. Well, you can imagine the hijinks that ensued. What a hoot!

I have another piece of exciting news (although I regret I cannot reveal the entirety of it yet): our new franchise is taking shape. The pieces are quickly coming together and it won't be long now before the official announcement. But I can tell you, exclusively, that you are the first to know the title of the first picture! It is:

JIMMY ESCAPADE, HARVEY METTLE: ISLAND DRINKS, VEGAS NIGHTS.

This news will surely spread like wildfire across the Interweb but you can say you heard it here first.

Last little bit. I have been toying with a new slogan for the Studio. It wouldn't supplant our iconic catchphrase but might supplement it in certain contexts (for example, the fruits of our Home Entertainment division). The slogan is "Bringing Your Dreams To The Screen, And Our Hearts To Your Home". What do you think?

Now, more than ever,
Griffin

At Long Last!

Loyal fans,

Max Fontana (Starmaker) promised you something special, and here it is -- the official teaser trailer for "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE". 'Nuff said. Enjoy!

Now, more than ever,
Griffin

That's A Wrap!

Hey Folks:

Max Fontana (Starmaker) here. I am posting for Griffin today, as he is stuck in the editing bay. He is working with our editors to put the finishing touches on something special for you. But you'll have to wait just a bit...

As most of you know, I am the producer of "CHEETAH VII" a/k/a "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE". Principal photography is finally over! And what a ride it was. As you might have read in the trades, just after the North Dakota portion of our shoot, we decided to part ways with the director of the film, Pierre Rousseau, over "creative differences". Griffin quickly stepped in to finish the shoot. (And how amazing is that? Not only did he write and produce the film but now he's also the director, not to mention the head of the Studio! I am not easily impressed but that guy is unbelievable.) Griffin's work truly captures our vision for the film. In retrospect, I think Griffin was right about the title; this really is a re-imagining of the franchise and not just another sequel. I think you will be very surprised/touched/impressed. If nothing else, you'll get to see thirty of the world's most beautiful celebrities all in one place... For those true insiders, you will be glad to know that Griffin donated his directing fee back to the film and we were able to stay on budget. It's a little thing in the grand scheme of it all but in these tough times (yes, even us here at the Studio have had to tighten our belts), it was a significant gesture. And to his credit, Pierre didn't gouge us either. You'll see every penny of the extra savings on screen.

I'm getting word that Griffin is ready for me. I wish I could tell you more. Check back soon for the exciting reveal!

Now more than ever,
Max

Insider's Treat

Welcome back. I am very pleased to announce that we have finished the Canadian portion of our shoot of "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE". All went well and the dailies look great. The cast and crew are now headed to North Dakota for the duration of principal.

And now, I have a special treat for all you "Cheetah" fans. Some of the die-hards may find this news quite schocking but here goes... amid rampant speculation, I can confirm that the villian in the new "Cheetah" movie is none other than [spoiler alert] -- JASPER LOCO! I can't say any more now but I'm sure this will keep the Interweb ablaze with chatter for the next few months. Many of you are probably asking, "But how can this be? Wasn't Jasper killed at the end of 'Cheetah IV'?" I wish I could give you more details but my Publicity Department would revolt. Needless to say, the return of everyone's favorite villian is an event not to be missed.

In other news, Eddie Falcon, LeTigre Jones, Max Fontana, Bruno Foxx and I are very close to greenlighting a new movie. A totally new franchise, this film will uphold the proud tradition of the Studio while forging a new path for us. More news soon on this front...

Now, more than ever,
Griffin

p.s. LeTigre has a twin brother named LeFever, who is in play...

Inevitability

Breaking News: I've just been informed that a paparazzo interloper invaded the set of "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE" and posted his photos online. Our Legal Department is working on the matter now. I knew this would happen eventually; I just hoped it wouldn't be so soon. You see, the Studio wants to present the best product to you, our fans, and when elements of the film are taken out of context or seen prematurely, they can be unfairly prejudicial. Nevertheless, with a franchise as big as "Cheetah", there is little hope of me holding back the floodgates. So, I'm posting the first official picture from the film. I can't comment on the context quite yet but needless to say, this "Cheetah" is going to be the best one yet! Hang on for one wild ride...

Now, more than ever,
Griffin

Must There Always Be Unity In Duality?

Welcome back. What a roller coaster this week has been...

As I pulled into the Studio today, a new security guard checked me in. He looked so young. Just a boy, really. And, while I don't think of myself as old, his youth certainly made me feel that way. I made my way to my office and was met by my assistants with the sad news that long-time friend of the Studio and composer for more of our films than I can count, "Skint" Wallerstein had finally passed away. I'm glad that I had a chance to visit with him in the hospital earlier this week but it doesn't make it any easier to say "goodbye". While older than me, he certainly wasn't old. Cancer is truly egalitarian in that way. Sandy has requested that, in lieu of flowers, donations be made to Skint's charity, "InstruMENTAL", which works to bring music education and instruments to inner city children.



I'll sign off now, the notes of the "Love Theme" from "CLAUDINE" as fresh in my mind now as the first time Skint played them for me in my office.

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

More Good News!

Welcome back. The following is just the "pick me up" the Studio needed after the somber news regarding Stage 33: We have signed an exclusive deal with the Bruno Foxx Casting Agency. There is certainly no need for me to remind you of Bruno's amazing eye for talent, having launched the career of almost every major star in the past six years. And don't believe what you've read in the trades regading Bruno's negotiating tactics; those reports are simply false. Bruno is nothing but a professional, through and through. The Studio is fortunate to have him as part of the team. Between Max and Bruno, I couldn't be more exciting about the prospects for our upcoming slate.

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

The Studio Needs YOUR Help

Hello, Friends. As many of you know, LeTigre Jones is our head of worldwide marketing, publicity and promotions. I respect him immensely and his track record speaks for itself. Nevertheless, we had quite the row this evening (we didn't engage in any fisticuffs but it was a rather heated exchange). The disagreement is as follows: LeTigre believes that the new Cheetah Larusse film should be entitled "CHEETAH LARUSSE VII" in recognition of the popularity and longevity of the project. However, it is my intention that the current picture reinvent and renew the franchise. Consistent with this "fresh start", I think the film should have a stand alone title, i.e., "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE". But, loyal fans, WHAT DO YOU THINK? You are the ones who have kept Cheetah alive these many years. So now's your chance...

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

Stage 33: Loss Of An Iconic Space

Welcome back to the Studio.

After receiving such a wonderful blessing in the guise of Max Fontana, it is with great regret that I must report that Stage 33 suffered a serious fire last night and the historic sound-stage was completely destroyed. Fortunately, no one was injured; and I'm sure we can all agree that it is the best result we could have hoped for in light of this unfortunate incident. The cause of the fire is still being investigated but it appears to be related to the elaborate pyrotechnics used in connection with the filming of "THE MANY LOVES OF CHEETAH LARUSSE". (Don't worry; production on the picture has been set back only a few days and we still anticipate releasing the movie next summer as planned.) You may recall that Stage 33 was the home to such memorable productions as "JUST THE MONEY" and "CLAUDINE". While the physical space is lost, the joy it brought us will live on forever in film...

Now, more than ever,

Griffin

A New Addition To The Team

Welcome to the Studio. Whether you've just found us or you're returning for a visit with old, familiar friends, I'm sure that you'll find your experience here to be a rewarding one.

The Studio has some exciting news today (this is an exclusive! for our loyal fans in advance of the formal press release, which should be hitting the wires soon after this post): We've hired a new employee: Max Fontana (Starmaker). He joins us from New York and will be part of the executive team (myself, Eddie Falcon and LeTigre Jones), responsible for bringing new faces and new talent to the Studio. Given his illustrious pedigree and past successes, I'm sure you'll agree that this is a real coup. Max will post soon but for now, let's give him a chance to get settled.

Otherwise, it is business as usual at the Studio.

Now, more than ever,
Griffin